Gap year doer

After a half day of work on Fridays I sit in front of my computer and look for scholarships for college. Mostly I try to find the sweepstakes kind that require no work, but eventually I’ll kick it into high gear. I’ve filled out many online application forms; you know the kind where you mindlessly write your name, address, first pet’s maiden name, etc. Well, I kept coming across the question: “What are you?” I’m not a high school student…thank God! In the spring I will be enrolling at Mount Saint Mary’s University, but I’m not a college student yet. So, if it’s offered I choose the “Adult/Non-traditional student” option.

The websites then proceed to offer me all the scholarships that are very clearly geared towards middle-aged single moms that want to finish getting a degree. I just stare back at the computer feeling awkward and stuck. The fact is there is not really a name for what I am.

Still, I’m lucky. I’m lucky that I was graduating high school at a time when gap years have been gaining popularity and acceptance. That doesn’t mean mine was easy to make happen, but I’ll leave that story for another day. I can’t begin to tell you the number of adults who have said, “I wish I’d known that was an option” or, “I wish I had done that before starting college and a career”. If you’re a teenager, or anyone finding their way, don’t forget that this is 21st century America (or other similarly developed country) and you don’t have to feel like your options are limited. You’re old enough by now that a major life decision like college (if, when, where, etc.) should be your decision, especially if you’ll be paying for it.

It’s my hope that all the generations after me to graduate high school won’t feel as much pressure as my peers and I did to go to college. And I know that the “everyone should go to college” mentality isn’t the case everywhere but in the white, middle and upper class, suburban area I went to high school in, it is pretty much the norm.

I could probably list a hundred reasons why a college-bound high school graduate should take a gap year. And trust me, I’m tempted. But I will leave that to Forbes (if you pass up every other link on this page, read this one) and The American Gap Association and the dean of admissions at Harvard. Please know, I’m not so biased that I think everyone needs to take a gap year before college. I simply believe everyone should think about it.

Instead of a manifesto I’ll just do my best to explain some of what went into my decision. The choice involved pro/con lists, research, and a ton of support and help from my mom, and it led to more choices.

It’s strange to think back so far to before I made this big decision and took that first leap of faith.

I have no problems with learning. With the right teacher I can fall in love with learning, in fact. However, for a plethora of reasons, it had been a long time since I had really enjoyed school. (If you’re thinking, “Well, of course, who likes school?” you should re-think how normal it is for everyone to hate the thing that consumes our days for the first 18 years of our lives. That should not be normal.) Sometime in my Junior year I was so overextended, stressed, and overwhelmed that I talked to my mom about dropping out of high school.

In the months after that low point I got better at handling school and to an extent I enjoyed shopping for a college. But, my dad didn’t forget my hatred for formal education so he was understandably shocked when I started talking more seriously about going to school for another four years. When I thought about my future I had to be realistic and that meant I came to the conclusion that sometime in the near future I needed to go to college. Still, I wasn’t excited about going to college straight after high school, so I started pursuing both paths.

I wanted to take a gap year to do service work in different places but I couldn’t officially put off college until I knew it would be possible. I couldn’t afford a program that was geared toward newly graduated 18 year olds and there aren’t an abundance of non-profits that are in the market for that demographic either.

As the gap year began to look plausible I made a pro/con list for going straight to college and one for the gap year. In the end, it seemed I had every reason not to go straight to college and an equal amount of reasons to take a gap year and to not take one. I knew of no one else that was thinking about taking a gap year, at the very least, not one like mine. I believe a famous Robert Frost poem about “a yellow wood” would be fitting here. I was choosing to be a year older than my peers when I enter college. I was risking scholarships being harder to get and school being more difficult to focus on when I return. The gap year, though, offered things I didn’t want to pass up.

I didn’t, and still don’t, know what I want to go to school for. I believe there’s no harm in entering college “Undeclared”; I still might do that. But I’ve heard so many stories of people who poured time, money, and energy into a degree that they ended up not liking or doing anything with. Whether I “find my path” or not this year I will and already have had more experiences to base important decisions about my future on.

What I did know was that I love volunteering. It gives me more joy and hope than most anything else. It makes my life feel more meaningful. Not only do I get that for the next year, but I’m also learning about a few different forms of service work. Everything I experience and do in the next year is going to enrich my college experience so much.

So, if you’re in the process of making decisions about your life after high school here’s where to start:
What my sister told me- Before you get lost in the throes of choosing a college decide if you want to go to college at all. It’s actually not for everyone.
What I’m telling you- Then decide why you want to go to college and finally decide when you want to go.

I’m not a “gap year goer” or “gap year taker” because it’s not like a vacation. I’m a gap year doer. I’m not “taking a year off”.  I’m learning more, or at least very different things, than I would be if I were at college this year. I may be taking a break from school but not from learning. Learning is what young minds were made for, not school. I think we all know how much life has to teach us just on its own.

Did you ever think about taking a gap year? Do you know anyone that is thinking about taking one?

 

Some of my research:

Emotionally Unprepared College Freshmen

YouTube: Some Rough Advice for the “Real World”

What to Ask Yourself When Considering a Gap Year

The Benefits of a Gap Year